Wednesday, April 29, 2009

A man with a badge.

You're driving down the Interstate, rockin' out to the latest song on the Christian radio station (WayFM here!). Your husband calls you on the phone, and you chat for a bit (hands free of course, *ahem*) then hang up as you step on the gas just a tad, anxious to get home because the kids are screaming in the background.

Please God don't let them kill each other before I get there, you pray.

You reach down to turn the volume up a bit, trying to forget the situation that awaits you at home. (Your husband informed you during your chat that one child wrote all over your brand new couch with a marker and your other child is sitting in a diaper full of poop and he says he'll only change it in exchange for you mowing the lawn, and THAT isn't going to happen...)

Then, you see it. Your heart slams into the wall of your chest at a pace faster than your speedometer reads, and you realize that you haven't taken a breathe in a full ten seconds, causing your ears to buzz. Your hands clench the steering wheel as your foot moves from the gas to the break pedal.

Then, you glance down at the dashboard to assess the potential damage.

And you breathe. Your heart slows, your fingers relax. Your foot returns to the gas.

You're only going 71 in a 70.

That policeman you're about to pass won't touch you with a ten foot pole, you are SO not worth his time.

Speeding ticket diverted. WOOHOO!

Discussion: Have you ever had a ticket? What for? Come on, spill it! If you've had so many that you can only afford Safe Auto insurance... you can tell us that too. We won't laugh... too hard!

10 comments:

Eric said...

Wow, never seen a speeding ticket possibility related with such passion and force. For such a trivial item, this is great writing.

Krista Phillips said...

LOL, thanks Eric! And welcome!!!

Lady Glamis said...

What a great post! I was riveted the whole time. And the mowing the lawn bit had me laughing. LOL.

Yes, I've had a ticket for causing an accident, and I've been pulled for various reasons, all my fault. For some reason acting like a dumb blond (which I am a lot) got me out of the tickets. :)

Thank you for visiting my blog! I appreciate it. Glad you're safe!

Krista Phillips said...

Lady Glamis, thanks for visiting MY blog. (I feel like you do when you send something and get a thankyou note... should you send a thankyou note for them sending a thankyou note? LOL)

I added the mowing the lawn part at the end...it's an inside joke between my hubby and I and deserves it's own fun blog post some day!

Cindy said...

Lol, Krista. It was like I was reading a book, very intense! I know that feeling precisely. Fortunately I've never had a ticket before, neither for speeding or causing an accident. And I plan on keeping it that way :)

Scott Phillips said...

You really are a great fictional writer hun! I don't believe I've EVER asked you to mow the lawn, but I DO remember YOU mowing it ONCE as a surprise to me! And it was a very nice surprise indeed. I love you Krista! Keep up the great fiction!

Krista Phillips said...

Cindy, good for you! I haven't either, but it's not for lack of a lead foot. More due to a heightened sense of awareness regarding the vacinity of cops. *grin*

Krista Phillips said...

Okay, Scotty-poo... You are right, you have never asked me to mow the lawn, and I appreciate that VERY much. (and you know you'd get laughed at pretty darn hard if you did... *grin*)

Everyone please remember this is fiction. My husband is awesome and can change a mean poopy diaper, can't ya babe!?

Jody Hedlund said...

I got out of a ticket when I was pregnant once! I think the officer took a look at my big belly behind the wheel and figured he didn't want to be the cause of me going into labor!

Did you get a new look to your blog? Looks different and really cute!

Krista Phillips said...

LOL Jody! Yes, a big ole pregnant belly is good for lots of things! Good parking spots at some stores, and getting out of speeding tickets! I was 6 months along when I was rearended by a semi-truck. Seriously, I thought the dude was gonna pee his pants when I got out of my car sobbing like a baby with a big ole round belly. *grin*

I DID do a little blog makeover. I’ve been meaning to for forever but just one of those “not as important as everything else” things, so I finally took a little time last night.

My next project is to pimp my blog a bit. I do it myself though, so it’s a little more difficult! No Cutestblogontheblock templates for it!